Wife who is carer is really a wonderful, loving, angel

June 5, 2017 / Ian Franks / Leave a comment

It’s been an eventful few days for the two of us at home here in Spain.

On Saturday, nine days ago, my beloved Lisa asked me to help put the washing out to dry. It’s an easy job that I can do sitting down, so I readily agreed. The trouble was that it was not one of my best days. Thanks to multiple sclerosis, I managed to fall while walking out of the back door onto our terrace.

I still have no idea how but the nail of the big toe on my left foot was torn upright. It was 90 degrees from its usual position. There was pain and blood – and plenty of the red stuff.

carer My wife Lisa is also my carer and is quite used to me spending time on the floor and could not see my injury, so she didn’t rush to my side. But she certainly arrived fast enough when I told her what was wrong.

In next to no time, she had stopped the bleeding and strapped up my toe. Luckily, once bandaged, the pain eased so that it only hurt if touched.

Wife and carer is an angel

A couple of days later, I visited our doctor. He removed the dressing and the nail came off with it. The wound started to bleed again but he quickly stopped it and sent me to a nurse to get it redressed. That started a series of one visit every two days, something I had to get used to here. The Spanish health service goes the extra mile to see that patients receive the best treatment.

However, these regular visits to the health centre are putting more stress on Lisa. Lifting my electric wheelchair out of, and back into, our car is a task that should not be repeated often. Meanwhile, at home, she is doing virtually all the work. She is my carer and refuses to ask me to help in case I am hurt again. In fact, while doing anything involving standing or walking is difficult, I try to do what I can.

One thing though, Lisa is always so grateful for whatever help I can give. But all she does for me makes her even more than my loving wife and carer.

She is my wonderful, loving, guardian angel who walks here on earth.

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50shadesofsun.com is the personal website of Ian Franks, a Features Writer with Medical News Today. He enjoyed a successful career as a journalist, from reporter to editor in the print media. He gained a Journalist of the Year award in his native UK. Ian received a diagnosis of MS in 2002 and now lives in the south of Spain. He uses a wheelchair and advocates on mobility and accessibility issues.

Thanks to those who love their jobs

October 15, 2015 / Ian Franks / Leave a comment

An off-duty Tennessee paramedic has hit the headlines, been on television and been featured on social media. And all because, before leaving the church to go to the reception, she was alerted by phone to a car accident involving her father and grandparents who were making the same journey and were then about two miles away.

So, wearing her long white wedding dress, Sarah Ray and her new husband, also a paramedic, rushed to the scene ready to use their skills to assist anyone who was hurt.

News Channel 5 in Nashville reported the incident had happened after another vehicle allegedly jumped a red light and ran into the back of the family’s car.

On reaching the scene, they found that her 72-year-old grandmother had suffered serious enough injuries to see her taken to hospital for treatment. Sarah said she had to reassure her grandmother that the crash had not ruined her day.

The bride’s mother, Marcy Martin, took a photograph of her daughter holding up her wedding dress as she walked away from the scene, with a police car and a fire engine in the background. The picture has since received much attention, with well-wishers calling her a hero.

Mary said: “I love this photo because it shows her true character.”

Then the bride’s employers got into the act by posting the picture on Facebook with the following comment: “How dedicated are you to your job? Sarah Ray, Paramedic with Montgomery County Emergency Medical Services, was photographed on her wedding night working the wreck of one of her wedding guests. Now that’s dedication…she stopped to assist on the way from the wedding to the reception! Thank you, Sarah, for loving what you do!”

Loving your job leads to doing great things like this.

Another example took place in Bristol after the Kids Club charity stopped operating. People who worked at the Island drop-in centre and had lost their jobs overnight returned the next day as volunteers, such was their dedication to the youngsters. They put their love for the job and the children before their own needs.

Now, the Creative Youth Network has taken over the running of the centre with funding from Bristol City Council, and is employing nine of those who refused to walk out on the children while still more continue to volunteer.

I cannot claim to do anything as noble as Sarah the paramedic or the former Kids Company employees but I do know all about loving my job.

During a career that started in 1970, yes 45 years ago, I have worked as a journalist, a public relations professional and even spent five years as a senior manager in a tourist attraction. In all those work environments there were the usual ups and down of everyday life but the only job that I really loved was the years spent as a journalist.

I love being creative and my experience in journalism is probably the main reason that, although I have a disability that prevents me from going out to work, I am able to write for my blog. These days, my time is my own, so on a good day, I might write a number of articles and then nothing for a few days. Employers don’t tend to like that.

Loving your job, or something else that you do, brings me to this picture that was on Facebook. The text on it is classic. It reads: ‘Doing what you like is freedom; Liking what you do is happiness’.

Let’s all be happy.

Live for the future, let the past go

September 27, 2015 / Ian Franks / Leave a comment

Vicky Balch has every right to be furious with the awful hand dealt to her this year but she really must get a firm grip on her life and look to the future with a new, positive outlook. Otherwise she is going to have a truly miserable time of it.

On 2nd June this year, Vicky was one of several people injured and trapped in an accident on the Smiler roller coaster at Alton Towers, one of the leading theme parks in the UK.

Her injuries were so bad that, despite a series of operations, surgeons eventually had to amputate one of her legs. Another young woman also lost a leg as the result of the accident.

Vicky hit the headlines again today when she lashed out at the decision of Alton Towers bosses to re-open the ride. She is reported as saying that two senior bosses told her of their intentions, during a visit to her home. She said that they told her that they might be able to reopen the ride by the end of this year.

She is disgusted by the possibility of the ride being reopened at all, let alone within seven months of the incident. Is she right? Perhaps, perhaps not.

Before considering that, though, maybe we should take a look at her attitude to life in general since she suffered that terrible injury.

There is no doubt that the accident caused a considerable upheaval in Vicky’s life we can see that she has not yet been able to come to terms with it. In all likelihood, it is too soon. She is still suffering, still grieving for things she can no longer do.

“I’m very up and down at the moment,” she is reported having said. “Talking about things I can’t do any more makes me really emotional.

“I can’t walk my dogs and I can’t ring up my friends at uni and say, do you fancy having a drink tonight?”

Yes, she is in a bad place right now but, and I don’t mean to be unkind here, she has to realise that she is no worse off than some other people. She is using a wheelchair for travelling more than a very short distance, just like me. But she has now taken her first steps using a prosthetic leg, while I will still need a wheelchair.

Again, Vicky looked back instead of forward when considering her future when she said: “I feel less feminine now. The way people look at you, that’s a big thing for me. I liked the attention before but now they look at me in a different way. It’s horrible.

“After my first op I asked my mum, ‘Who’s going to want me like this?’ And I still think like that.” Well, while it is true that the guy she had been dating has now left the scene, I have no idea of what went on between them at that point and so will not comment on that.

However, looking ahead, Vicky is likely to meet men who are shallow and so avoid any possibility of a relationship with her but she will also meet some who see beyond her injury, beyond her prosthetic leg, and fall in love with who she is.

But first, she needs to let go of the past, accept the present and make the very best of the future. That’s the way to find happiness.

So, what about reopening the ride? Alton Towers’ management has discovered the accident was the result of human error. There was nothing wrong with the ride itself, they say. If that is true, as long as steps have been taken to eliminate an error such as this happening again and the authorities are happy, then put the accident in the past and let the ride be reopened.

And in the unlikely event that she is reading this: Vicky, we cannot change the past but what you do now will affect your life to come. You can make yours a great life, embrace it and live it to the full. Shape your life around what you can do now and what you can strive to achieve in the future.